You have been reading all those stories about me, Haikus even, by my cat Viggo, and I just want to tell you that Viggo is a fabricator of fibs.
Yes, I am an older dog, but I am NOT decrepit nor smelly and I hardly ever fart. Well, only when I have had cheese.
The only truth Viggo has told you is that he isn't allowed in my basket. Too right he isn't!
So let me tell you something about that cat: he snores! There, I've said it.
And you can understand why I keep some distance between us, can't you?
By the way, the chain was an experiment, but I didn't like it. So it was not repeated.
My Master fenced in the entire garden instead. I don't mind that.
Any way. Do NOT believe anything that cat tells you!